
silence of a forest in waiting
steel skies scarred spark & flint
here she comes raining & how
we celebrate her summer rains
drinking her in as she pours

No campfires for me last night, I’d decided. Instead, I elected to wander away into the day that followed flame as I left the camp behind: Sun blazing on one side, Moon cool and pale on the other. Maple’s yellow leaves fell mystic around me, an autumn kind of sakura celebration lacking only the plum wine for the stream ran beside me, falling over stones and breaking white the reflection of the sky.
(more…)
somewhere along the path
i somehow lost my way
that was what
old craggy guy
was trying to say, just
get back to the sit...
an expert leading
by example

Back to the campfire…
It the shadows and glow of the flickering ruddy flames, he looks gaunt, grey, and emaciated as he approaches and sits down. His hair, what remains on his taut pate, is a dirty white and as withered as he — scraggly, sparse and I can see more skin than hair.
(more…)
It often feels pretentious to talk about my thoughts around my path towards rewilding. I mean, who do I think I am to turn away from the norms and follow the trail deeper into the woods?
It is also difficult to do so because I have rejected most of the labels people use.
(more…)of godless ways wandering
between gallows gone to grey
the rocky shore's blackwater
framed in deadwood propped
in seaweed and broken oar
waiting for the sluagh's arms
to embrace a heart of coal
the company of ravens and
a host of crows waiting
waiting
waiting
for snows to fall

There’s something appealing about taking up fasting again. I laid awake at my normal lay awake time last night (2.45am to at least 3.30am) contemplating taking up fasting. Not the hardcore fasting where you go for days on end. I’ve already proved to myself that I have that kind of willpower that it takes to pull that off. I lasted 7 days, or maybe it was 10 — I forget — when I was much younger. I actually needed to will myself to get back into eating after that period of time, whichever duration it was.
No, what I’m talking about is something closer to intermittent fasting. I haven’t thought out the details, but I can see limited fasting as a mental and spiritual exercise. Besides, I’m starting to have a hate side of the love/hate relationship with food emerge again.
Or maybe it was the thinking about that summer and autumn in Seattle before returning to Minnesota. Those days, I had to remind myself to eat. Some days I didn’t bother. I was definitely on a “I hate food” binge at the time. Coffee was good. I drank a river of coffee during that time. Smoked quite a few smokes too.
That was all fine and dandy when it was just me living out on my own, but the family would worry about my mental state and health if I approached things that way now, so it would be better to just limit and eliminate some of my food consumption rather than all-out, hardcore fasting.
I’m not sure what I would want to accomplish. I’ve got my eigengrau moods that come more often than they go. And it wouldn’t hurt to rewild my spirit a bit. A touch of hunger has a way of bringing out the feral.
Maybe I can fast out the funk?
There, a title for this post — catchy and topical. Just the kind of thing SEO managers love.
Have you fasted? Any particular reason for doing so if you have? Do you think it is weird and unhealthy? Comment away!

I walked the beaded hallways red with you and you did not see, not really. Yes yes that’s very beautiful you said as we walked not the beauty of buckskin and ruddy skin. You saw only the patterned beads.
You did not hear the heartbeat drums causing the red hallways to thrum and pulse as you raced towards the light, making sure you could say you had experienced it all for yourself, but you did not hear, nor see.
You did not feel their blood on your skin, nor the sweat, nor the tears. You said you knew it all, had read it in a book you couldn’t recall the title of, nor author. And you pulled me along, not letting me linger to “feel the feels”. You told me you would find the book in the library for me so I could feel.
I reached for the medicine up in the night, but you bound me to prevent “my escape”.
I spoke to ravens and stones.
You just stared at me.

sun and shadow
dancing the bones
between the tonights
laid over growing
groundcover dark
within the wode
acorn man mad they
call his wanders
under oak over stone
pond water mirrors
his autumn ways
hey hey they call of above
do not walk yourself lost
black laughter rising
he laughs along
wanderwalking the wode
acorn man disguised