I’ve decided that I need to get out into the real world and step away from my man cave in the basement more often. Although I am not much of a people-person, I have been feeling the need for face-to-face human interaction from people other than family members.
Essentially, I’m looking to take a break from extreme isolation that has been the hallmark of my existence since I elected to sober up. Over the past 16 years, I’ve largely forgotten how to socialize, which is starting to wear a bit on my psyche.
On a lark last night, I went to two different game stores that not only sell physical games (cards, board, pen and paper), but have areas set aside for the community to play games. I was quickly reminded why I don’t much care for that community: it tends to lean chauvinistic and into “adult adolescent” (30-year-old’s trapped in a 12-year-old boy’s mindset) male culture.
Some of the players seemed offended that my eldest daughter was accompanying me as we browsed games to consider bringing home to play with the rest of the family. Sexual innuendos said loud enough for her to hear and most definitely warning against trying to join in on their precious games of Magic: The Gathering (or similar games).
No Girls Allowed mentality. Only “real men”/boy’s club can participate.
It was sad and disgusting, but saved me from the effort of trying to see how to join in on such game sessions and I quickly crossed it off my list of potential ways to participate in being social. And, to boot, someone got into a lengthy argument about technicalities of gameplay instead of just playing. I play games for fun, not to argue minutia in order to win a hand at what is essentially a modified cardstock form of rock, paper, or scissors. It was off-putting to hear two grown men argue in their whiny, nasally voices over a single attack in a card battle.
Joining a curling team seems like it might be fun, but my body has been hurting a lot of late and the costs to actually get involved in the sport are not insignificant.
I may investigate further all the same, as I find the ice-equivalent to throwing horseshoes to have some appeal. It is a game simple in theory, complex in practice. But maybe not at the present moment, not until I can get the gumption to call people for more information on trying out the sport for a few hours to see if it is something my body will handle. You’d think the necessary information would be plainly evident online, but they don’t seem to be willing to share the information all that readily.
So I put on my thinking cap and ended up semi-deciding that I might start attending writing workshops again. The last time I did, I was so turned off by some in the community that I walked away from the local writing scene completely.
That was shortly before I entered my sobriety. I won’t go into the details, but there was a certain cattiness from the participants in several workshops and at least one of the workshop instructors (whose writing criticisms were often unfair and based on stylistic preferences rather than on merit; and notably harsher for all men in the group while being much milder critiques for younger, attractive women).
I’ve gained some maturity since then, and could care less about the popularity contest that triggered much of my distaste back then. I’m hoping that by going to a handful of these workshops, I can see ways in which I can improve my fiction — specifically, flash fiction and short stories.
I’ve started moving away from being interested in writing novels and I have gone back to being more invested in writing short-form fiction when I am not writing poetry. The two sessions I am planning on signing up for, a day session and a 4-wk (1 day/wk) session I am looking to explore are laser focused on flash fiction. And they are in-person workshops (as opposed to online), so there is always a chance that I could meet someone or several someones that I could interact with outside of the workshop, which may give me an excuse to get out of the basement and out into the public eye once again.
And that, folks, is something that I think I sorely need to do to maintain some sanity in my life. The potential improvements to my writing are secondary to increasing my social sphere.
Leave a comment. Markdown use is permitted.